Dear Kevin

Dearest husband.

I am writing a thank you letter for... well... just being you. I knew when we first met that I had met one of the most amazing people in my life. I knew you'd be a great father, a supportive husband, and a life partner I would be proud to have by my side. Somehow, though, it seems I underestimated just how great you would be.

Four months after we were married my company came to me with a proposal to do a short working stint in Switzerland. They kept telling me to think about it and talk it over with you (which I agreed), but I didn't really hesitate to say yes because I knew you would be supportive, which of course you were. You dealt with the long-distance phone calls and detailed descriptions of my travel trips to Zurich, Florence, Budapest and Milan.

Part of what makes me think we are such a great team is because we keep each other in check. When I decide I want something, I move quickly to seek immediate gratification. But you let things simmer, mull it over, and make sure it's something you really want. I will use Delaney's big girl bed as an example. 6 months ago I decided we needed to start thinking about her big girl bed and flipped intently through magazines and looked online for the right bed. I was ready to purchase. You insisted it was way too soon and we should cool our jets (and wisely pay off the grand or two we had accumulated on credit cards with a few other big purchases in our life). I insisted that we were EVENTUALLY going to need the bed so why not buy it now? But something you said made sense, and I have yet to purchase that big girl bed I thought was so urgent 6 months ago. Delaney hasn't made any motion to move out of her crib, we are completely debt-free, and it makes way more sense to buy it now. You provide balance to my hot-headed need for things to be perfect, right, comfortable and fun. Your patience with me is commendable.

We have been through our share of crap as a couple... lots and lots of physical separation, 3 lost babies, a colicky infant and lack of money. But through each one of these things your strength, determination and resilience is inspiring. Every time we go through something bad, it seems like you step up even more than before. At some point during the craziest time of Delaney's fussy stage, I found myself rocking back and forth with her, saying to myself over and over that I really had found the right man to marry. And, ok, maybe I was somewhat loony during that time, but I know for sure that I would NOT have survived that period with as much sanity as I did if you were not so supportive.

Last Saturday we spent nearly the entire day as a family, save for your bike ride during Delaney's nap. Delaney was thrilled to be with both of us all day and we both were enjoying it too. It felt SO right that it seemed like this was exactly what we were supposed to be doing in life. When I watch you two together it feels like being Delaney's father is what YOU were supposed to do all of your life. Your relationship is so natural, free, silly, and loving. I love how you cheerfully greet her at the end of the day and get genuinely excited when I tell you that you'll be spending time with Delaney because of my ___(fill in the blank with girls night, book club, class, etc). You genuinely like being a father and it shows.

And yes, I get sad and angry that you have to leave us on a regular basis to go to faraway places like China and Bangladesh. And I've thought many times that I wish you had a job that was more regular and would keep you home more. But the truth is that I love that your job brings you happiness and I wouldn't trade our situation for anything. Because how could you be happy with us if you had a job that you detested? Just one of the many things that I like and admire about you is the intensity and commitment with which you tackle what you do for a living (triathlon, business school, the outdoor industry). Your meteoric rise in your industry over the last 4 years is a testament to your strength.

Those are the big things, and the little things I love and appreciate are almost too plentiful to mention, although I will list a few. I love that you have learned to cook (albeit originally out of necessity because I refused to cook during a lot of my first pregnancy) and you have cheerfully taken on at least half of the family cooking. I love that you let me get that extra 10-25 minutes of sleep in the morning (most days) and very often handle the first part of Delaney's morning. I love that you let me pick the movies we go see (most of the time). I love that you're a snazzy dresser and that you're in awesome shape. I love that you occasionally help me garden when I fall behind. I love that you bring in the milk on Mondays. I love that after hearing me complain a few times that "someone" needed to help me more with the pets, you started taking Lucy to the park almost every day (and also started feeding both Lucy and Ellie). I love that you love your family. I love that you happily put pig tails in Delaney's hair on the mornings when you get her dressed.

My parents have said many times that they feel like they can move on to another life peacefully because they know their children have found happiness and spouses to take care of us. It's a morbid thought but as a mother now I could see how freeing that would make you feel, after spending your entire life being the sole caretaker and guide for your children. In a strange way I feel the same peace. I just know we are going to have a great life. We have so much happiness ahead of us, and I'm thrilled to be on this life journey with you.

Love,
Court